A Boy and His Dog
Zach driving Jimi to their new home in Colorado (Spring 2016)
A boy and his dog.
I have thought of this phrase often observing Zach and his brothers with their dog, Jimi (the Hedrix version of the name). Although I loved this sweet dog, he was not mine. The boys' dad added Jimi to their family shortly after we divorced. But it didn't take long to fall in love with Jimi’s amiable canine personality.
Introduced to me in the stands of a pee wee baseball game, I instantly knew why my boys were so drawn to this pup. An epitome of the lovable lab from the movie, Marley and Me, Jimi never met a stranger and affectionately welcomed everyone he encountered. His eyes would look for acceptance wanting affirmation in the form of a quick pet or rub under the ear. That's all it took to have Jimi as a friend for life.
Jim was a good dog.
I distinctly remember texting my sister-in-law, Robbie, asking how the boys were doing one weekend with their dad. It was in the early days of the post-divorce decree. This was a weekend they were not with me but with their dad. I was feeling empty and alone. I missed the boys and wanted a glimpse into their life without me.
Jim was a puppy. That particular weekend without me consisted of boating and lake time. The text back to me is one that warmed my heart.
"Grant has been playing with the dog. Throwing a stick on the beach, over and over. Just a boy and his dog.”
Just a boy and his dog.
Although there was a tinge of pain not being a part of the festivities, I felt relief visualizing my boys’ happiness with their new puppy.
Zach, in particular, had a close kinship with Jimi. Through Jim's many trials and tribulations from clumsily breaking household items to eating things he shouldn't, Zach always had a soft spot for his furry sidekick.
The boys fought over whose dog Jim was, but Zach just stopped arguing. He knew the answer. Jimi had a lot of love to give, but he ended up most often at Zach's side.
This was no surprise to me. They were a natural match. Zach has loved dogs since a child. When he was young, you could always find Zach making friends with the hounds when the others were off causing havoc on the playground. Zach would eventually join the playground fun, but the dogs would come first.
When Zach announced that he would be moving Jimi with him to Fort Collins, it was no surprise. I couldn’t think of two better souls bachin’ it together.
Jimi quickly became my 'grand-dog'. A lot more planning went into our visits with Zach now that his cherished dog was involved. Trips were planned to Fort Collins instead of meeting halfway. Jim didn't like to travel and preferred to stay at home. I understood. So we accommodated. Many fun trips to northern CO followed with the dog only in tow for short rides and quick hikes. Zach always catered to his sweet dog's needs.
My phone calls with Zach always ended with my asking about Jimi.
"And how is Jim?"
Jimi loved the Colorado mountains and the reservoir where they lived. He and Zach basked in the glory of the Rockies with Zach often commenting on their walks and the freshness of the open door. And Jimi thrived.
A boy and his dog.
Until Jim got sick. Now my phone calls to Zach ended with "Is Jimi any better?"
Some days were better than others. Then last Sunday, Jim didn't want to get up. Zach took him to the animal ER. Within 24 short hours, Jimi is gone. And my son is broken without his pal.
My typical call from Zach would be on a walk with Jim, describing their day in the mountains. Today was different. Zach was crying.
"Mom, Jim is full of cancer. I have to put him down."
My son's voice could barely give these words air.
Just like that, his buddy was gone.
As a mom, this was unbearable. His dad and I immediately talked, feeling the pain of this loss together through the grief of our child.
My sister-in-law, Robbie, has often shared parenting advice that stays on my mind. Although we are the same age, her kids are older. Her advice to me on what's ahead in the parenting road has always rung true.
"The older the kids, the fewer the problems, but the bigger the problems."
She's right (like always).
My youngest child's issues in daily high school life seem minuscule compared to the loss of a faithful companion to my oldest. Hearing my grown son's tearful pain was crushing. Upon reflection, I couldn't remember the last time I heard Zach cry. When he was two? Sometime in the toddler years?
Life certainly gives us unexpected turns. Sad. Unfair. But so a part of our life journey.
Zach got to hold his buddy and say goodbye while Jim slipped away with no pain. The tears continued from all of us as this reality set in. Likely the cancer had been there for some time. Upon reflection, what a gift to both Jimi and Zach that they were able to enjoy the last six months of his life in the tranquil beauty of the Colorado mountains. Not the ending we wanted, but a life well lived.
RIP Jimi Lane XOXOX
